So. Goals. At this time of year it can be a hot button topic for many, both in a positive way, but also in a negative way. My feed seems to be full of people making commitments to not make commitments. Or people proclaiming great things are anon in 2020. Which I sincerely hope is the case. Like, for real. I want you to achieve everything you can dream of in your life.
Long ago, I made a commitment to myself that I would strive for greatness. At the time, I may not have known what that meant, but as you start moving in a direction, the greatness reveals itself. As you make plans and goals and break those massive dreams down into manageable pieces, you find that the sum of your life, and your experience is greatness.
“Know this one great truth: you are in control of your own life. You get one and only one chance to live, and life is passing you by. Stop beating yourself up, and dang it, stop letting others do it too. Stop accepting less than you deserve. Stop buying things you can’t afford to impress people you don’t even really like. Stop eating your feelings instead of working through them. Stop buying your kids’ love with food, or toys, or friendship because it’s easier than parenting. Stop abusing your body and your mind. Stop! Just get off the never-ending track.” ― Rachel Hollis, Girl, Wash Your Face: Stop Believing the Lies About Who You Are so You Can Become Who You Were Meant to Be
So this is why it breaks my heart to see people who have given up on making goals for themselves. Or they consistently set goals then do not show up for themselves. They don’t take action to make those dreams a reality in their lives.
I need a new paragraph for this next piece, because it is that important. You are worth taking chances on. You are worth the effort to chase down those dreams of greatness. You are worth showing up for and holding yourself accountable for your health, happiness and experiences. A quotation has come to my attention multiple times in the last weeks that I want to share: “The only difference between stupidity and courage is the outcome.” No idea who said it, but how on point. I think what is missing from this is that, even if the outcome is failure, chalk it up to the success tax, and try again, but smarter this time because you already know one way it won’t work.
There are millions of people who give up on themselves because they met with one way it won’t work, or even several ways. But there are also millions of people who evaluated what went well, reframed their thoughts about the outcome, and tackled the problem again and changed their outcome. The difference is that they showed up, they were resilient, they had a growth mindset, they kept focusing their thoughts on one more thing they can do now to make this a reality.
2018 was a pivotal year for me. I left the safety of a job that paid the bills and invested all of our life’s savings in a dream. The funny part is it wasn’t part of my life’s goals to own a Yoga Studio. But it is part of my life’s goals to make a difference in the world. To have rewarding, satisfying work where I can make an impact. When we moved back to the area in 2016 I kept saying where is the yoga studio? Being the manifestor that I am, the universe told me to get to work and The Wellness Collective was born. The jury is still out on whether it was courageous or stupid, but I know that if I keep asking myself how to be of service, and how can I have an impact, it will keep moving towards the greatness that I dream of. But I did something. I saw an opportunity, and I said now is the time. The greatness will reveal itself if I start walking this path.
I want to challenge you to explore what your prevailing thoughts are. Pay particular attention to when you tell yourself or others “I can’t.” I don’t believe in I can’t. I believe in I won’t. I believe in not right now. I believe in not all at once. But, can’t isn’t part of my vocabulary. It is a wonderful word to leave behind in 2019 if you haven’t already done so. If you need a transition phrase, consider saying not a priority instead of can’t. Or better yet, focus on what you can do to bring you closer to your big, wild, wonderful dreams for your life.
Just because you haven’t stuck to goals in the past, doesn’t mean that this time you won’t. You just have to show up smarter. You have to decide that the commitments you make for yourself are more important than the commitments you make with Netflix or whatever your drug of choice is. It may be your habit to let yourself off the hook in the past. But you can make a better choice. You CAN be healthier, happier, more abundant, more engaged in your relationships and have a richer, fuller experience. But it starts with you. Full stop. Think about what you need to see and experience to lead the best possible life for you. Reverse engineer it and start chasing those things down.
Planning and breaking down massive goals into manageable steps will make you feel better and give you the space to dream big.
Now set some goals, and get to work.